Week 2
Greetings Leaguemates!
Welcome to the week 2 edition of the weekly wrap-up. Life is immensely more stressful with a struggling fantasy team, as I’m sure Kurt, Ian, and Michael can attest to. Currently stuck at the finish line, the three managers have combined for as many wins as GM Kelly has playoff appearances. Others in the league however, have gotten off to a flying start and saw no sense of slowing down in week 2 such as Ravagn’ Rainbows, Hoochie Mamas, and Mr. Nice Guy. Let’s take our first look at the power rankings, introduced due to popular demand:
1) Ravagn’ Rainbows
Currently steamrolling the rest of the competition led by lethal RBs and a devastating ariel attack, Ravagn’ Rainbows and GM Connor show no sign of slowing down.
2) Mr. Nice Guy
Putting together another solid performance and claiming their first victory of the season, as long as James Conner remains the starter, Mr. Nice Guy will continue to be a formidable opponent.
3) Hoochie Mamas
Showing their Mahomes cojones (someone give me feedback on this one here) GM August is laughing at the preseason skeptics with another solid teamwide performance.
4) Miking Mikes
Crashing back down to Earth after an astronomic week 1, GM Darren and the Mikes have incredible upside, but could be prone to major inconsistencies throughout the season thanks to their dependence on Kamar at the RB position.
5) Bigpapihugetime
Clearly outperforming the story their record may tell, the huge times are just waiting for primetime to break out. Throwback to last year anyone?
6) Pasca’s Daddy
Apparently going through a midseason franchise transition, the new team name bumps up a team vastly outscoring their projections. Don’t expect these results to continue however anyone who has Pasca as a son must be pretty damn awesome.
7) Belichick Yo Self
Two decent weeks in a row have seen Belichick Yo Self act as the league benchmark. If AB and Derrick Henry can get going they will soar up the rankings. Until then, if you don’t know how your team is doing, better check yo self compared to this team and you’ll have a good idea.
8) Grafton’s A Bum
Someone in management here needs to fire their Marketing Director because so far team names have just been ironically false statements. Did you guys really think you were getting Barkley at 10th? The Bums had a great week thanks to Captain Kirk and Keelan Cole but that’s about it unless we see major changes at the RB position.
9) Tittsburgh Feelers
Flipping 180 after an abysmal season opener, the Feelers have potential to be a competitor if they can work and produce together as a unit. The Watson and Fuller stack is deadly and combined with a Hunt and Howard combo, this team will easily climb up the table.
10) Scoregasms
Similar to the Papi’s, Scoregasms’ record does not reveal what’s truly going on. Scraping by with a victory week 1 and beating a team of Mikes obviously hungover from extending the party the night before, GM Brody has benefited from easy matchups while also making multiple managerial mistakes. Not even to mention their RB situation is one giant question mark.
11) Ravioli Ravioli
It’s tough to rank the Ravioli’s because there is so much potential on this team, but they haven’t shown it yet. Changes still need to be made at the WR position and their top dog RBs need to start acting like some.
12) Crunching Munchies
Bottoming out the rankings are the Crumbling Crunching Munchies who have clear production issues. Desperately needing their RBs to get healthy and a Mark Ingram return, there is nowhere but up for them to really go.
Matchup Highlights:
Mr. Nice Guy takes the cake in the Wildcat Matchup of the Week and doesn’t bother to share with Bigpapihugetime, defeating them 111 to 97. In his pregame press conference, GM Kurt put it best, complaining that “Grafton’s team has no weakness” and it’s looking true. Julio Jones has a slow game so TY Gurley and Conner all step up. Just imagine if they all produce together in a week... GM Kurt’s WR super squad Hopkins, Thomas, and Tate stood no chance despite their best efforts. Mr. Nice Guy improves to 1-1 and will look to continue their high flying performances to reach the upper sector of the table. Bigpapihugetime falls to 0-2 and will need a win soon or else GM Kurt might start threatening to give away the franchise again.
Ravagn’ Rainbows launched an epic comeback win Sunday after Hoochie Mamas jumped the gun Thursday night with a 24 point AJ Green performance. Led by Big Ben, Gordon, Juju and Tyreek the freak, the Rainbows were able to rally and keep the Mahomes Movement at bay with a narrow 5 point victory. A third quarter goal-line TD to an injured Jay Ajayi was the difference in this match, giving GM Connor the win as he leads the league 2-0 while GM August drops to 1-1.
Miking Mikes must have thought this was Daily Fantasy and we were running a one week league because they forgot to show up for week 2. Scoregasms took the blowout victory on the back of WR Diggs and his back to back TD catches. GM Darren was left on his back staring at the sky, having flashbacks to GM Brody’s deadly go route at Blue Jay Point. Furthermore, in what seems to be becoming a small one-sided rivalry, Brody has knocked Darren out of the playoffs twice in a row, and looks poised to do so yet again, climbing to 2-0 while Darren drops to 1-1.
Pasca’s Daddy (2-0) claims another victory this week against Belichick Yo Self (1-1). Leading the way for Daddy are the WR core which overperformed again this week with a combined 45 points from Thielen, Evans, and Golladay. This vastly outproduced their competition of AB, Davante Adams and Nelson Agholor by over 10 points which just so happened to be the margin of victory in this one, 104-94. Coincidence? I think not, as first rounder AB struggled despite an excellent performance from Big Ben.
Tittsburgh Feelers (1-1) bounced back by defeating the hapless Ravioli’s (0-2) in a 110-90 rout. The Feelers combined a great aerial attack with Fuller and Cooper (29 points) with a solid running game (30 points) and defensive effort (13 points). In contrast, Ravioli Ravioli is lacking any kind of supporting cast as Cam, CMC, and Zeke accounted for nearly 70% of their entire teams production. They also were better off not even playing defense as they yet again got negative points on the other side of the ball.
Grafton’s A Bum (1-1) defeated a crippled Crunching Munchies (0-2) team 102-91. Falling behind early in the game, the Munchies were chasing a slimmer of hope thanks to Rivers and Powell while a last gasp, dart throw in the dark Lockett brought the team back halfway from their deficit. GM Pasca blames the loss on lacking firepower this week, getting a combined 1.8 points from their first 6 draft picks. GM Kelly was the beneficiary of a dream of a gamescript from the Vikings-Packers game, earning an extra 25 points in the final 5 minutes of the game plus overtime. Breakout WR Keelan Cole also helped his team gain their first victory with a basket of amazing Odell-like catches as well as a deep corner TD to secure the 11 point victory.
Weekly Awards:
This weeks Murphy Mixup goes to GM Brody of Scoregasms for benching elite TE Travis Kelce and replacing him with George Kittle. Kelce punished Brody in the form of 23 squandered points while Kittle barely earned a whopping 2. Sure, Kelce disappointed in week 1 while Kittle excelled, but to get caught chasing points from previous weeks is a rookie mistake one would only make if they didn’t actually draft their own team or some other ridiculous reason to not understand your players. Luckily, the botched move did not prove to be critical, as other players stepped up in his place for Scoregasms to preserve the win.
GM Kelly gets awarded with his play of the week to start WR Keelan Cole, earning 18 points and leading the Bums to victory. Cole proved himself to be a big breakout player with spectacular catches and route running, dominating targets in the Jaguars passing game. Keep up the solid start decisions and you just might win more than 5 games this year!
WTF Waiver Wire: Awarded to a ridiculous add/drop or spending bonkers of FAAB on a player
GM Kelly is the inaugural winner for the waiver wire award, inexplicably dropping newly acquired WRs Josh Doctson and Calvin Ridley. Not only did Kelly trade away 2nd rounder Julio Jones for these two players, he also spent $14 to replace them, now holding the lowest budget in the league at $86. Nevermind Kelly, looks like 5 wins might be your ceiling again.
Finally let’s take a quick peek at the matchups for week 3:
Two 1-1 teams with big boom potential face off as Barkley and Green will look to beat out AB and Davante Adams. Look for Derrick Henry to continue to struggle against a fearless Jaguars defense while Lamar Miller breaks out for the Yo Selfs. QBs Mahomes and Brees will both put up big numbers with the difference maker coming from Rolls Royce Freeman who salvages a TD to bring the Mamas to victory.
Which Mike will show up this week? I’m predicting the dynamic Kamara will explode against division rivals while Gronk returns back to his usual dominant self. Burkhead joins the Ravioli ground game to make it competitive, but the Mikes just have too much Miking power.
GM Brody good matchup fortune continues as David Johnson finally explodes for the Scoregasms while RBs Jamaal Williams and Dion Lewis are shut down for the Bums.
In a critical early season matchup with both teams desperately needing a win to jumpstart their campaign after starting 0-2, look for all the RBs to dominate for both teams. The difference will come at WR where Hopkins and Thomas easily take the edge.
The Rainbows slap the Feelers back to Tittsburgh led by all the players I already talked about. Kareem Hunt and Will Fuller make it somewhat close, but no real doubt here.
Grafton, just go ahead and shut Dom up. This one won’t be close.
So there you have it, Week 2 is officially in the books. As we turn the page to week 3, let’s all hope Bell continues to hold out because that would be uber annoying if Dom could play him too. Adios and best of luck!
Welcome to the week 2 edition of the weekly wrap-up. Life is immensely more stressful with a struggling fantasy team, as I’m sure Kurt, Ian, and Michael can attest to. Currently stuck at the finish line, the three managers have combined for as many wins as GM Kelly has playoff appearances. Others in the league however, have gotten off to a flying start and saw no sense of slowing down in week 2 such as Ravagn’ Rainbows, Hoochie Mamas, and Mr. Nice Guy. Let’s take our first look at the power rankings, introduced due to popular demand:
1) Ravagn’ Rainbows
Currently steamrolling the rest of the competition led by lethal RBs and a devastating ariel attack, Ravagn’ Rainbows and GM Connor show no sign of slowing down.
2) Mr. Nice Guy
Putting together another solid performance and claiming their first victory of the season, as long as James Conner remains the starter, Mr. Nice Guy will continue to be a formidable opponent.
3) Hoochie Mamas
Showing their Mahomes cojones (someone give me feedback on this one here) GM August is laughing at the preseason skeptics with another solid teamwide performance.
4) Miking Mikes
Crashing back down to Earth after an astronomic week 1, GM Darren and the Mikes have incredible upside, but could be prone to major inconsistencies throughout the season thanks to their dependence on Kamar at the RB position.
5) Bigpapihugetime
Clearly outperforming the story their record may tell, the huge times are just waiting for primetime to break out. Throwback to last year anyone?
6) Pasca’s Daddy
Apparently going through a midseason franchise transition, the new team name bumps up a team vastly outscoring their projections. Don’t expect these results to continue however anyone who has Pasca as a son must be pretty damn awesome.
7) Belichick Yo Self
Two decent weeks in a row have seen Belichick Yo Self act as the league benchmark. If AB and Derrick Henry can get going they will soar up the rankings. Until then, if you don’t know how your team is doing, better check yo self compared to this team and you’ll have a good idea.
8) Grafton’s A Bum
Someone in management here needs to fire their Marketing Director because so far team names have just been ironically false statements. Did you guys really think you were getting Barkley at 10th? The Bums had a great week thanks to Captain Kirk and Keelan Cole but that’s about it unless we see major changes at the RB position.
9) Tittsburgh Feelers
Flipping 180 after an abysmal season opener, the Feelers have potential to be a competitor if they can work and produce together as a unit. The Watson and Fuller stack is deadly and combined with a Hunt and Howard combo, this team will easily climb up the table.
10) Scoregasms
Similar to the Papi’s, Scoregasms’ record does not reveal what’s truly going on. Scraping by with a victory week 1 and beating a team of Mikes obviously hungover from extending the party the night before, GM Brody has benefited from easy matchups while also making multiple managerial mistakes. Not even to mention their RB situation is one giant question mark.
11) Ravioli Ravioli
It’s tough to rank the Ravioli’s because there is so much potential on this team, but they haven’t shown it yet. Changes still need to be made at the WR position and their top dog RBs need to start acting like some.
12) Crunching Munchies
Bottoming out the rankings are the Crumbling Crunching Munchies who have clear production issues. Desperately needing their RBs to get healthy and a Mark Ingram return, there is nowhere but up for them to really go.
Matchup Highlights:
Mr. Nice Guy takes the cake in the Wildcat Matchup of the Week and doesn’t bother to share with Bigpapihugetime, defeating them 111 to 97. In his pregame press conference, GM Kurt put it best, complaining that “Grafton’s team has no weakness” and it’s looking true. Julio Jones has a slow game so TY Gurley and Conner all step up. Just imagine if they all produce together in a week... GM Kurt’s WR super squad Hopkins, Thomas, and Tate stood no chance despite their best efforts. Mr. Nice Guy improves to 1-1 and will look to continue their high flying performances to reach the upper sector of the table. Bigpapihugetime falls to 0-2 and will need a win soon or else GM Kurt might start threatening to give away the franchise again.
Ravagn’ Rainbows launched an epic comeback win Sunday after Hoochie Mamas jumped the gun Thursday night with a 24 point AJ Green performance. Led by Big Ben, Gordon, Juju and Tyreek the freak, the Rainbows were able to rally and keep the Mahomes Movement at bay with a narrow 5 point victory. A third quarter goal-line TD to an injured Jay Ajayi was the difference in this match, giving GM Connor the win as he leads the league 2-0 while GM August drops to 1-1.
Miking Mikes must have thought this was Daily Fantasy and we were running a one week league because they forgot to show up for week 2. Scoregasms took the blowout victory on the back of WR Diggs and his back to back TD catches. GM Darren was left on his back staring at the sky, having flashbacks to GM Brody’s deadly go route at Blue Jay Point. Furthermore, in what seems to be becoming a small one-sided rivalry, Brody has knocked Darren out of the playoffs twice in a row, and looks poised to do so yet again, climbing to 2-0 while Darren drops to 1-1.
Pasca’s Daddy (2-0) claims another victory this week against Belichick Yo Self (1-1). Leading the way for Daddy are the WR core which overperformed again this week with a combined 45 points from Thielen, Evans, and Golladay. This vastly outproduced their competition of AB, Davante Adams and Nelson Agholor by over 10 points which just so happened to be the margin of victory in this one, 104-94. Coincidence? I think not, as first rounder AB struggled despite an excellent performance from Big Ben.
Tittsburgh Feelers (1-1) bounced back by defeating the hapless Ravioli’s (0-2) in a 110-90 rout. The Feelers combined a great aerial attack with Fuller and Cooper (29 points) with a solid running game (30 points) and defensive effort (13 points). In contrast, Ravioli Ravioli is lacking any kind of supporting cast as Cam, CMC, and Zeke accounted for nearly 70% of their entire teams production. They also were better off not even playing defense as they yet again got negative points on the other side of the ball.
Grafton’s A Bum (1-1) defeated a crippled Crunching Munchies (0-2) team 102-91. Falling behind early in the game, the Munchies were chasing a slimmer of hope thanks to Rivers and Powell while a last gasp, dart throw in the dark Lockett brought the team back halfway from their deficit. GM Pasca blames the loss on lacking firepower this week, getting a combined 1.8 points from their first 6 draft picks. GM Kelly was the beneficiary of a dream of a gamescript from the Vikings-Packers game, earning an extra 25 points in the final 5 minutes of the game plus overtime. Breakout WR Keelan Cole also helped his team gain their first victory with a basket of amazing Odell-like catches as well as a deep corner TD to secure the 11 point victory.
Weekly Awards:
- Murphy Mixup:
This weeks Murphy Mixup goes to GM Brody of Scoregasms for benching elite TE Travis Kelce and replacing him with George Kittle. Kelce punished Brody in the form of 23 squandered points while Kittle barely earned a whopping 2. Sure, Kelce disappointed in week 1 while Kittle excelled, but to get caught chasing points from previous weeks is a rookie mistake one would only make if they didn’t actually draft their own team or some other ridiculous reason to not understand your players. Luckily, the botched move did not prove to be critical, as other players stepped up in his place for Scoregasms to preserve the win.
- Oh Boy! Play of the Week:
GM Kelly gets awarded with his play of the week to start WR Keelan Cole, earning 18 points and leading the Bums to victory. Cole proved himself to be a big breakout player with spectacular catches and route running, dominating targets in the Jaguars passing game. Keep up the solid start decisions and you just might win more than 5 games this year!
WTF Waiver Wire: Awarded to a ridiculous add/drop or spending bonkers of FAAB on a player
GM Kelly is the inaugural winner for the waiver wire award, inexplicably dropping newly acquired WRs Josh Doctson and Calvin Ridley. Not only did Kelly trade away 2nd rounder Julio Jones for these two players, he also spent $14 to replace them, now holding the lowest budget in the league at $86. Nevermind Kelly, looks like 5 wins might be your ceiling again.
- DTDB Moment of the Week: Catch up on who's on top and who's on the bottom
GM Dom takes a turn on top this week as GM Darren and his team get to tired to keep up the pace. Dom continues to ram the competition with another victory while Darren appeared rather submissive this week, mustering a measly 72 points and definitely not hitting his climax.
Finally let’s take a quick peek at the matchups for week 3:
- Belichick Yo Self vs Hoochie Mamas: Wildcat Matchup of the Week
Two 1-1 teams with big boom potential face off as Barkley and Green will look to beat out AB and Davante Adams. Look for Derrick Henry to continue to struggle against a fearless Jaguars defense while Lamar Miller breaks out for the Yo Selfs. QBs Mahomes and Brees will both put up big numbers with the difference maker coming from Rolls Royce Freeman who salvages a TD to bring the Mamas to victory.
- Ravioli Ravioli vs Miking Mikes:
Which Mike will show up this week? I’m predicting the dynamic Kamara will explode against division rivals while Gronk returns back to his usual dominant self. Burkhead joins the Ravioli ground game to make it competitive, but the Mikes just have too much Miking power.
- Scoregasms vs Grafton’s A Bum
GM Brody good matchup fortune continues as David Johnson finally explodes for the Scoregasms while RBs Jamaal Williams and Dion Lewis are shut down for the Bums.
- Crunching Munchies vs Bigpapihugetime:
In a critical early season matchup with both teams desperately needing a win to jumpstart their campaign after starting 0-2, look for all the RBs to dominate for both teams. The difference will come at WR where Hopkins and Thomas easily take the edge.
- Ravagn’ Rainbows vs Tittsburgh Feelers:
The Rainbows slap the Feelers back to Tittsburgh led by all the players I already talked about. Kareem Hunt and Will Fuller make it somewhat close, but no real doubt here.
- Mr. Nice Guy vs Pasca’s Daddy:
Grafton, just go ahead and shut Dom up. This one won’t be close.
So there you have it, Week 2 is officially in the books. As we turn the page to week 3, let’s all hope Bell continues to hold out because that would be uber annoying if Dom could play him too. Adios and best of luck!
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